Tag Archives: Smashwords

Damn Blog, W8-BEN news…

Why doesn’t it look after itself? I’m frazzled, trying to edit #TheThing (up to end of Book 1, only 3 more to go), keep up on Twitter (dropping in a few days a week to shout at the world) and keep myself fed/exercised. No, that’s not a pony-ness allusion – the pony thing had to go by the wayside, because i found a loophole. Possibly a pony-hole?

Anyhoo, I talked to the Australian Tax Office – who as i’ve said before are nice people and you shouldn’t be afraid to call them and say um, i haven’t paid tax for some time. Because if you do turn yourself in, they’ll be nice back to you. A friend did pretty much that, and even got a refund for several years.

I found out the dude who told me not to give my Tax File Number (aka in US-tax-speak as TIN) to ANYONE was being a trifle over-protective. And also, i found a page on Smashwords (if you’re not logged in to Smashwords AND have an Author account there, that link won’t be much use) where the W8-BEN form is basically filled in, i just had to add my TFN. (And then i went back, found it was showing as incorrect. I filled it in again, this time adding on Line 10 that i was a non-US resident and a citizen of another country where i was resident, and it seems to have gone through. Here’s hoping.)

So, if like me you’d despaired of ever figuring out the horrifying web of overseas tax forms (and what to do about a 40% tax rate on 60% of a $2.99 book!) then despair no more. Or even despayah no moah! Sorry, felt the need to do a US accent for that, and like most people, my view of the USA is rather coloured by Southern reality TV shows.

I did visit the US once – across Wisconsin (the Oshkosh Fly In) and Minnesota, down the New Jersey Turnpike, and into the Bronx. And a little bit of Pennsylvania. If you’re reading this from Frenchman’s Creek or Phoenixville – omg, i’ve been there!

And then i burned the chickpeas! No, not during my visit to the US, many years ago, but right here in real life. *sigh* Was trying to save money by soaking overnight then cooking from scratch, and did something i haven’t done for literally years. Let the pot boil dry while distracted by the internet.

I forgot to mention in the last post, where i was distracted by something else (possibly also food-related), that the first two ebooks will be free, (to say thanks to the people who bought the original Book 1, The Birthday Dragon, as they’ll get more of the story they’ve been waiting 6 years for *blushes*).

The second two won’t be free. I need to get a little income so i can print some copies, for myself to proof and to give away in competitions.

A maybe is an omnibus edition (ebook only at this point) of the 4 books in one download. That will cost, but again, i’ll be doing competitions come the time.

Of course, i went back on Smashwords to see how my book was going (number 4 on Fantasy books over 100k, 9 on any length Fantasy, No 7  on Sci Fi Any length, No2 over 100k).

There was someone who seemed to be doing very well. Lots of laudatory reviews. And then i realised the same people were reviewing the author’s (and only the author’s) books. Yeah, another author giving in to fake review syndrome. Very organised, give them that. 140 or so different reviewers, carefully cycling through all the books and giving good reviews. I looked at samples of the books, and they were so bad I wondered how the writer could be so deluded. But then delusion is apparently what creative wannabe’s do very well. (No, we’re not going to talk about my ex’s. Though that could be a cue.)

Still waiting for Smashwords to do something (i did give them enough evidence to act) but the last time they literally took nearly 18 months, so i’m not holding my breath. Does show though – if you just rely on Smashwords, you don’t get any sales (and you may be driven to make a few of your own). Well, you may get some if you shout real loud on Twitter. That’s my plan.

Once again, a warning. Always read a bit of the book first, before purchase. Because good reviews might mean the Writer is quite good at juggling Fake Reviewers on a spreadsheet. Yeah i know, i have quite a few good reviews. Mine are all legit and the writers can be found on Twitter or elsewhere, having lives. None are even from family, because my family doesn’t support my writing at all. (And no, that’s not a cue for a piece on the perfidy of families. Though i admit, it sounds like one.)

However, i might be lying. So what will you do? Yep, when i release the books, you can look at the first 20% and decide whether to buy or download.

Meanwhile, i have a pot to scrub. And chickpeas to soak. And yeah, 3 books where i need to get on with the paper edits.

copyright 2017 https://stinginthetail.wordpress.com

 

 


Self-imposed Social Media Exile: Day 37

  • I have begun to hallucinate conversations with people online. I have them in my head rather than logging on. This saves heaps of time and reduces chances of arguments.
  • The baby hippo pics are not up to par. Have been forced to watch National Geographic doco’s to get my hit.
  • my Klout is in freefall. Down to 45! Despite formerly being a well-respected social media guru (over 50 on Klout) I’ve now lost my social media guru-status.
  • The Birthday Dragon (my debut novel) is sliding up and down the various charts on Smashwords – last seen at number 6 on Highest Rated but it’s fallen off the Best Sellers – i did suspect it showing there was a glitch, or that books on Smashwords only had to sell a copy a month to rate.
  • Yet again, some hot young pop starlet is supposed to be looking at one of my songs with view to recording it. Goddamn it, stop getting my hopes up, bitchez! Record something, then don’t wipe out on drugs or unsuitable men, and make my freaking fortune. Mind you, you killing yourself could be good for sales. *looks thoughtful*

****

In other news: I have pretty much given up on my first book (The Birthday Dragon – yep the one on the right of this post with the pretty cover). Not completely, just on spending much more time pushing it for now, as for the first 10 weeks of its publication – while it topped all the charts – it was completely invisible.

So all the work i did (and the work done by all my lovely friends who actually bought it, or won it as a prize, and were kind enough to do reviews for me) was pretty much pointless.

 ****

This last has induced a state of Siamese Zen™ which means instead of being really that chilled, i’m a bit tight-wired, and might kill something. Oh, yeah, the book was invisible because i made the mistake of marking it Adult.

I figured seeing people were having sex i probably should. It’s a novel for adults, with adult themes, including frank discussions of various sexualities, pretty constant drug use, and a hero whose main motivation is usually getting laid, so i figured Adult it should be.

Turns out that was huge mistake, one that took months to discover. As most of the Erotica isn’t Adult rated, there’s no need for The Birthday Dragon to be as it’s a novel, not a pornographic work (it’s also known as #TheThing when on Twitter).

Especially because Smashwords was completely blocking any passers-by from seeing the book.  The only people who could see it were those went direct via a link  (which meant usually people who happened to follow me on Twitter), or those who knew the site and had switched off the Adult filter, which is in about 4pt type in the top right of the page.

*sounds of screaming*

****

But hey, i did a good deed, told another author about it – her book seemed excellent (from my glance at the sample), she’d been published 6 months longer than i had, and was invisible. How could i not say anything? She’d marked hers Adult because she used the F word.

We were both left shaking our heads (and no doubt both using the F word and worse rather a lot) at how Smashwords never bothered to say, in BIG letters, that

Adult means Nobody Can See You.

****

Yeah, so i was feeling really fucked off a trifle dispirited at that, especially since i’d wasted rather a lot of time both promoting my book and trying to find out why, after the first few weeks, there was no buzz. No interest. Nobody was even looking.

Finally, the fact that it was invisible was revealed, just as i completely ran out of energy and time. Oh and sanity. That’s where i’m at. Like a sensible person, i’m writing Book 2, and will relaunch Book 1 when i do.

I’m very glad there are people out there who liked Book 1 and are prepared to say so in public. I’m hoping at least some of you meant it about wanting to buy Book 2. Which reminds me, if you read it and haven’t done a review, please do (at link just above), they make a huge difference to site visibility and thus to people’s interest.

This time, while you’re all enthused and telling people about the book, they WILL be able to find it easily on Smashwords.

*bangs head on desk rather a lot, for a very long time*

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  • When i write about 2011, it will be the “Year of The Headdesk”.

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Book 2 is currently titled “Dragonskin” – as yes, you guessed it, this it the book where Polo learns to control shapechanging. Of course, being Polo, he’s going to take the scenic route to that discovery.

The half-brother second-in-line to the throne is still out to get our hero, thinking up inventive ways to kill him slowly, but he has to let the enemy in the north take their turn. The heir to the throne, having driven Polo away, is still plotting to take over the world. He may just manage it.

Polo’s just trying to survive. Little matter of having joined the army while on a drunken bender. He has three years.

****

I’ve shifted my estimated publication date for Book 2 – which was “before Christmas 2011” – because no way will i make that.

Currently aiming at “first couple of months of 2012” and earlier the better, but i’ll keep you posted.

Now shoo, i’m busy writing.

copyright 2011 https://stinginthetail.wordpress.com/