With zombies, u need to blow their heads off…

I wrote a cranky post about how Michael Jackson’s death circus was sickening me. I was wondering if, when Gary Glitter or OJ die, everyone was going to prance around saying things like…

“Aw, his mommy/daddy was mean/abusive/over-pushy to him, let’s forget about the nasty (a) child sex (b)  murders (c) the armed robbery that finally sent the SOB to gaol (d) moments when he bought his his way out of a court case.”

But it was too cranky. And might have got me sued, lol. Yes, this is the cleaned up version. What do you mean, you can’t tell? Feck, i’m on drugs, i’ll say that in my defence.

With the original post, by then, the drugs had kicked in, and i was no longer in quite such an evil mood. The Queen of Darkness had been in total control. Pain does awful things to my empathy chip.

Small children start to self-combust around me. It’s scenic, and looks great through the filter of the drugs i’m on, but people talk. Next thing i’m being shunned at the pharmacy like when i ran over those pensioners in my tank.

When the drugs kick in, the voices-outside-my-head – the compassionate, nice ones – take over, and I can even feel sorry for the freak and his still-travelling freakshow.

This is me, biting my tongue. And on enough drugs to no longer care. Seriously. This is someone else, who didn’t and wasn’t. But of course, they have a legal department, and besides, they’re part of the Murdoch Empire, so they end up in the category of Satan’s Minions and it’s quite alright if you want to go hate them.

You can hate me too if you like, but it won’t do any good either, i don’t like Michael Jackson – i didn’t when he was alive, and i’m not going to be a mealy-mouthed hypocrite and start acting like he was some kind of wonderful person.

I quite agreed with the article, but then i’m a monarchist anarchist, which is simultaneously so left wing and so right wing, that I sort of meet myself out the back somewhere, but in an attractive way – which is why you really need to vote for me as Queen of Darkness.

As the writer so eloquently points out – in regard to Michael Jackson – playing the victim doesn’t entitle you to abuse others.

(Look, i’m being nice, and paraphrasing things so you don’t have to go looking at links unless you want to. Yep, am completely wasted.)


When i take a break during the day, (from the epic sci fi fantasy thing, which keeps morphing, so i won’t say any more than that, as already i don’t think it’s going to be a rite-de-passage story any more), my main source of amusement is Twitter.

It’s many other things as well as a laugh, including friendship, the opportunity to help others, (shh, i have these urges, i can’t help it – oh damn, now i’ve told you i have to kill you), and to both teach and learn – oh, and to make a right royal arse of myself, when i forget how many hyper-intelligent people are actually paying attention.

I like everyone in my list, or they wouldn’t be there. Some, i love to bits. A favourite tweep (or whatever the singular form of tweeple is), is @_SATAN_ . He’s playing the role so well, i find myself wanting to actually applaud.

_SATAN_ is in Australia, of course, because even the Kingdom of Darkness appreciates booze, sport, sunshine, and a social security safety net that includes healthcare. He’s in Victoria i believe, but @__God_ is in South Australia.

Which possibly explains __God_’s drinking problem, there are a lot of vineyards there. He seems to be falling apart lately.

__God_ Really people, who here hasn’t shat themselves after a few snifters? Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.

Turned out he was coming out as a sharter in a fabulous rant (over several more tweets) in support of a footballer who literally mistook a hotel corridor for a toilet.  __God_ only knows if he’s going to make it through the footy season. I mentioned that sharting was a sign of alcoholism.

(In the following examples, for those not familiar with Twitter, an @ sign means the post is directed to the person after the @.)

_God_ @stinginthetail daily binge drinker is the preferred terminology, thankyou

__God_ Poached salmon and bok choy in ginger broth. White tea. Someone please kill me now. I NEED SATURATED FAT AND ALCOHOL!!!

We may need to get _SATAN_ to do an intervention. Mind you, he’s  more likely to say something like this.

@_SATAN_ Who was it that said ‘everything in moderation?’ Ha! Moderation is for wimps and losers. You’re not a loser, now, are you?

He makes it all seem sensible. His conversations with other people are the most fascinating things, and it’s well worth following threads. _SATAN_  wouldn’t be the Bad Boy of Hell without Tweets like…

@_SATAN_ Now, if your girlfriend is being too demanding, why don’t you glass her? It’s the only way she’ll learn, dears..

Glassing – for those not familiar with the term – means smashing a glass in someone’s face. Yes, it’s horrible – he’s _SATAN_.

And in the Aussie news, another footballer was gaoled for eight months with good behaviour, after he glassed his girlfriend in the eye during an argument, then lied and said she’d fallen, changed his story and tried to blame it on his best mate, and then tried to argue that it wasn’t that bad because the doctors managed to sew her back together neatly.

Here in Australia, if there’s evidence of an assault, you don’t need a complainant to charge someone. (Oh yeah, _SATAN_ would be proud, she’s still with him.) It’s Australia in the winter – of course __God_ and _SATAN_ are football fans. They both get great replies...

ScotPThomas @_SATAN_ “Glass her”, o dark lord? Is there a recommended technique that I should use or should I just be creative?

And this…

Espimufin @_SATAN_ what if she’s not my girlfriend? can I glass her anyway?

I ended up following both those guys, they seem promising. (Erm, yes, they were being funny, i read their other tweets.) _SATAN_ and I had a nice conversation about sex toys and masturbation.

He’s preaching to the choir here. Of course, i’m not the only one with a Dark Kingdom passport…

ScotPThomas @_SATAN_ so how hard would it be, to like get in the top of the armies of hell? I mean, I’m already a member of the media. Good enough?

As _SATAN_ says…

_SATAN_ The Stones say “you can’t always get what you want”…well, I’m here to tell you that you can. All you need is a semi-automatic…

Well what have i been telling you? Yes, a man after my own heart. And yes, it does seem, as the lovely Tweet_Fail reminded me, when i said he was worth a follow…

Tweet_Fail @stinginthetail Nepotism: The AntiChrist and Queen of Darkness recommending @_Satan_ – Nice!

However, I’m the only one with badges.

to visit the site, click on badge.

badge designed by me at http://www.says-it.com/

© stinginthetail.wordpress.com


About stinginthetail

On Twitter as @stinginthetail. I write as Lee Abrey. Free copy of my top-rated book Polo Shawcross: The Birthday Dragon at http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/63286 View all posts by stinginthetail

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