I was reading the very interesting Pro Blogger who is actually a professional blogger (and making a nice living). He’s a fellow Aussie, (so you know he’s the coolest of the cool, hehehe), and seems to have thought of everything a blogger might want to know. He gives a list of 21 Ways to Write Posts That Are Guaranteed to Grow Your Blog. Just being controversial, passionate, and opinionated gives you three of them.
Oh, phew. I can stop pretending to be meek and mild. I read several pages on his site, and learned a lot. Linking to him like this is also a good idea to grow your readership, lol, but i’m doing it because i ran into him on Twitter and liked his blog.
I like learning about what i do. Learning one’s craft is important. I’ve unwittingly been doing things right, getting most of the 21 Ways. It made me think about what i want this blog to be. Earning money from it seems a stretch, but gosh, it would be nice.
We crossed the 200 visitors mark on the weekend. *skips about* Pro Blogger said if he doesn’t get that a day with even a baby blog, he feels lonely. Ahem. I had about 30 yesterday, and was thrilled, lol.
My obsessions with sex, porn, politics, and religion will stand me in good stead with getting hits from crazed masturbators on Google with upping my readership. It’s not intentional, I really am obsessed with those things. Well, with shouting about them.
Trying to explain what a bad thing the Net Filter is, and why – that’s also good – people like their news explained and repotted a bit. Being funny – also good. Thank heavens for that. So what am i missing?
Well, Number 11 “write something that gives people a sense of belonging”. Hmm – oh, wait, everyone’s got their jackboots on, ready to invade Budgewoi the moment i get the tank serviced. You’re all part of the invasion force. (Anyone who hasn’t got their jackboots, please contact the blog slave, he’s dealing with back orders.)
See, we all belong. I’m an anarchist monarchist, i get to be queen, then you lot can do what you like. Anyway, I can only boss one or two of you at a time, you’re quite safe.
I like being helpful, so that part of the list, (several points could be summed up as helping others in various ways) yep, got those. However, i don’t think i’m tapping into your fears enough. Maybe we should call for a list? Ooh – Number 10 – write something that elicits a response. I keep forgetting, you’re allowed to talk back.
Hmm… am I “unique”, yep, aside from being plagiarised, and “newsworthy”? Well, I thought it was news when i got plagiarised.
Oh – and making money out of a blog? If this surprises me and becomes immensely popular, i’ll be thrilled. I’ll help it, by using tips i glean from people with the kind of traffic i can only dream about, lol. Then i’ll have to get my own site and be serious, i suppose.
If you want to make money out of yours, read Mr Pro Blogger – lots of tips and tricks. He’s also got a jobs board (with actual jobs on it, unlike most sites i see around) if you’re looking for pro blogging work. I didn’t even know there was such a thing.
Look at me, promoting someone else just because they’re good. I can be nice even when i have PMS – who knew? Yes, I still have PMS. We’re running late but it’s nothing to worry about, i’m just a day late. The hormonal overload, despite my best efforts with anti-PMS herbs, has reached crescendo point.
I lost it while cooking last night – the chicken wasn’t done, when i had everything else ready to go. Much weeping and gnashing of teeth, (sorta like in the Bible, but in the kitchen), to the point where Mr Bastard had to take over.
However, it gave me an idea. I’ve figured out a way to make money whilst helping you to focus on your fears. Now most of you, men and women alike, are afraid of a woman with PMS, right? Especially when she has a tank. *looks innocent*
This is the deal – i won’t come round your place and cry at you, and all you have to do in return is tithe me. I’ll take cake, phonecards, or dark chocolate. Oh – and money, if you have any, i still need an office chair.
Simple, non? I can’t believe nobody has done this before.
*sounds of whispering*
Oh, wait, i’ve just been told, churches do this. Well, that settles it, I’m going to register as a religion!
That’s the way to really make money.